Watching Headling News at 2:40 in the morning brings interesting thoughts to my head.

Okay, so I'm sure you are all just dying to know how last night went. Or two nights ago. Whatever.

Well, it could have been worse, how about that? I fucked up a couple of times, Amanda fucked up a couple of times, it all evened out. We did some beautiful covering for each other, and Jake saved our asses more than once because he rocks hard core like that. The audience was disappointing; it was basically just family and friends. And they were dead. I'm so used to hearing whoops and hollers during curtain call (for anybody!) that it ws a huge let down to hear nothing but straight applause. Crazy stuff.

I was truly amazed by the guys tonight. They were spot on. Amanda and I caught all of their mistakes, but I don't think anyone else did. It was great. And the auduience was freaking amazing. They applauded after Questions!!! I so hope we get that tomorrow. Tonight. Doh.

I had fun as the messenger. I got to announce when intermission started, and threaten death to all of those who didn't immediately return to their seats at the end of intermission. Amanda and I just kind of stood there in the middle of the lobby, in character, breaking only a couple of times (like when Brad stood in front of me and stared at me before I finally relented and gave him a hug ;-). It was quite fun.

Can't wiat for tonight's show. Though there did seem to be soem tension there for awhile from Jake since Chris is coming and Jake knows I invited him...we're over it. I think. I hope so. I hope everyone else does, too. I think everyone in the cast who knows Jake is immediately taking his side in the situation. Tonight, Jessica was asking why on Earth Chris was coming to the show, and Jake told her it was because I invited him. It's kinda putting me in an awkward situation, 'cause I adore Jake but...I adore Chris, too. 'Cause as much as I love Jake, he doesn't get into bitch fights with me in the mall, or dub himself my bitch-hort (since all psycho bitches need one!).

So yeah. Tonight when I got home from the (rather dull) cast party, I got on and bitched to Chris, who made me feel much better. I've slowly been doing insane the last few weeks. I've felt so cut off from my circle of friends 'cause I haven't seen any of them outside of play rehearsal, really. It's been so frustrating. I catch bits and pieces about what's going on in everyone's lives, but for the most part I'm completely lost. I'm hoping that once the play's over, I'll get to be more involved again. Well, I already know I'm gonna be spending all my free time with Jake 'cause we audition for Cafe Apollo next Friday, and we need to practice Elephant Love Song Medley. I also need to help him with Vocalaire audition stuff, and I might be helping Lyndon as well.

Have I mentioned yet that I love coaching people? But don't worry, this latest stint isn't going to inspire me to become a Voice Teacher. Yeah, I'm feeling even more stressed out than I was in the weeks following my breakup, but I have learned from that experience. Plus, I'm slowly gaining more time, so I can get in here to vent my feelings, or get on MSN to talk to Chris, lol. Every once in awhile, I just need to bitch, be assured that everything's okay, and be told by someone outside my family that they're proud of me, 'cause I'm an incredible actor, and incredible singer and an incredible person.

Fuck. And I'm so tired and so stressed that just that little kindness is making me fucking cry. This does not bode well for tonight's show.

Fuck.

A sexy woman who could also kick the tar out of you.

--Angela

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